Good Afternoon my brother’s and sister’s in Christ. I pray you’ve spent your time living intentionally and with purpose. We are a few days post my usual Self-Care Sunday blog. Seems I’ve been transitioning out of the routine of posting every Sunday. Needless to say, behind the scenes of blogging I’ve had my hand in a few other projects. My last post talked about the foundations of a Christian Holistic Lifestyle. To sum it up it’s the decision one makes to live whole in all aspects of life. Spiritually, Mentally, Emotionally, and Physically. I provided some ideas useful for promoting more activity in those 4 areas daily. I pray they helped all of you who are interested in shifting the way you’ve chosen to live.
This past week I found myself feeling off balanced. In the past when this feeling would come over me I would resort to things or activities to make myself “feel better.” Fast forward to the present day I’m more interested in acknowledging an unsteady emotion while discovering the trigger behind it. This week I couldn’t figure out the trigger immediately. What caused me to be in a state of “Blah?” One thing I know is we can be so close to a situation we can’t see what’s in front of us. I spoke to my Spiritual Mentor and she brought clarity to my clouded emotion. With her wisdom, we were able to pinpoint a trigger of mine. Goals! Expectations! Time!
Have you ever heard the phrase, “I’m my worse critic?” Truly, this is something God is healing me from daily. I no longer bash myself verbally like I once did. However, the pressure I place on myself to produce in a certain time frame doesn’t always align with God’s timing. The pressure was my adversary in the unbalanced emotional state I felt earlier this week. I realized even though I’m growing I can’t speed up the process of my growth. With all my goals and visions there is a time and season for them to fully bloom. The Bible depicts this concept as seed, time, and harvest. I believe most of us throw the towel in right when the “time” portion exceeds what we had in mind.
This was it! I subconsciously started to feel defeat, because I realized the journey ahead of me wasn’t instantaneous. I understood in order for me to operate in the fullness of who God created me to be would take more TIME. We spend so much of our life living how we want then expect God to expedite our journey to our purpose. Reflecting, I’m not sure I really conceptualized what it would take to undo all the layers of who I chose to be before I gave myself to Christ. With each growth spurt, I experienced an additional discovery of hidden triggers. Who I was all those years produced layers of chaos and as they are exposed God is correcting each layer.
I had a dream a few nights ago. My local Pastor spoke to me saying,” You are in a state of Corrective Chaos.” When I opened my eyes I looked up the definition of both words. I had this revelation: Corrective Chaos is the state in which God corrects or counteracts complete disorder and confusion. The Holy Spirit calmed my uneasiness immediately. Jesus is correcting EVERY chaotic thing associated with me and my history. This is why I couldn’t speed up the process. He was undoing what I had done while allowing me to grow in my newness. My instruction during this time was to endure the process, have compassion for who I was, and fall in love with who I’m becoming. Thank you, Jesus.
Perhaps you’re on your journey to purpose and find yourself applying pressure where it isn’t needed. Maybe you’re growing weary in your well-doing. If so, I want to encourage you. I want you to stop applying pressure in the places God is correcting. One thing I know about working under pressure is you’ll never produce optimally. If you operate in a state of pressure you lose the clarity, and wisdom needed for the task. It’s time to stop pressuring yourself to produce a harvest out of season. It will NEVER happen. So take a deep breath. Listen to what God is telling you. Most importantly, endure the process, have compassion for who you were, and fall in love with who you’re becoming. Blessings!
“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”Galatians 6:9